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Pro Travel Tips For Idiots

Pro tips for Americans traveling abroad:

1. Don't go to authoritarian regimes (Belarus, Russia, North Korea, Hungary, Egypt, etc.)

2. If you must go to an authoritarian regime, respect the local laws. That means if there's a zero-tolerance narcotics policy, you don't have any THC or cannabis on your person or bags. This also applies to free nations with zero-tolerance narcotics policies, like Japan. Yeah. 420 + Japan = prison!

3. As a general rule, you should know and respect the laws of wherever you are. This includes US states that aren't yours or nations that aren't yours.

4. If you are a guest worker in a nation that is about to go to war, check the US State Department guidelines on whether it's safe for you to keep guest working in that country. Remember, being an American makes you liked in some countries, and hated in others (more the latter). Check to see if being a US citizen makes you a target for political imprisonment and an unbalanced prisoner swap.

5. Related to # 4 - A note about American privilege. Being a US citizen is a birthright privilege. It is not a card that gets you out of trouble abroad. If a nation beats people to death who take down propaganda posters, that rule applies to Americans as much as anyone else. Perhaps even more so. Just ask Otto. Oh, Otto! Can you comment? Otto is not available to comment.